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Bad translations make me lough
Описание:
This is for all of you out there, who, like me have read the signs in foreign countries and found yourself laughing uncontrollably.
"Pot Lamb in its/his/her/your juices
Grandmother's homespun skybacon whith scum" (Will Ellis Jones)
“On a box of a clockwork toy in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.” (Ambrose Li)
In a mountain town in Poland:
Tourists beware. Mountains are only for the clever ones. (provided by Katherine Brown)
In the vegetarian section of a menu in Koh Samet, Thailand: 'Grilled Aborigine' When ordered, it took ages to come, and when asked where it was they said they'd run out of that!!! (provided by Cerys Vaughan)
From a sake ad in Japan: A person can drink sake for the following five reasons. First of all, for the national holiday. Moreover, it fills with nectar. Finally, for reasons. Next, to heal the dryness of the place. After that, to refuse the future.
In a Czech tourist agency: Take one of our horse driven tours--we guarantee no miscarriages.
Ad for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride your own ass?
On a faucet in a Finnish restroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for the ladies from their own skin.
On a box of a clockwork toy in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop--Drive sideways.
Swiss mountain inn: Special today--no ice cream.
Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed like a man.
Tokyo bar: Special cocktail for the ladies with nuts.
Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
Office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.
Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find that they are best in the long run.
Japanese instructions on an air conditioner: Cooles & Heates. If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
Car rental brochure in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking; Here speeching American.
A sign on the lion cage at a zoo in the Czech Republic: No smoothen the lion.
A Finnish hotel's instructions in case of fire: If you are unable to leave your room, expose yourself in the window.
A notice in a Japanese hotel: Please not to steal towels. If you are not person to do such, please not to read notice.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
In a Belgrade elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9&11 am daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian orthodox Monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
This is for all of you out there, who, like me have read the signs in foreign countries and found yourself laughing uncontrollably.
"Pot Lamb in its/his/her/your juices
Grandmother's homespun skybacon whith scum" (Will Ellis Jones)
“On a box of a clockwork toy in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.” (Ambrose Li)
In a mountain town in Poland:
Tourists beware. Mountains are only for the clever ones. (provided by Katherine Brown)
In the vegetarian section of a menu in Koh Samet, Thailand: 'Grilled Aborigine' When ordered, it took ages to come, and when asked where it was they said they'd run out of that!!! (provided by Cerys Vaughan)
From a sake ad in Japan: A person can drink sake for the following five reasons. First of all, for the national holiday. Moreover, it fills with nectar. Finally, for reasons. Next, to heal the dryness of the place. After that, to refuse the future.
In a Czech tourist agency: Take one of our horse driven tours--we guarantee no miscarriages.
Ad for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride your own ass?
On a faucet in a Finnish restroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for the ladies from their own skin.
On a box of a clockwork toy in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop--Drive sideways.
Swiss mountain inn: Special today--no ice cream.
Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed like a man.
Tokyo bar: Special cocktail for the ladies with nuts.
Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
Office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.
Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find that they are best in the long run.
Japanese instructions on an air conditioner: Cooles & Heates. If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
Car rental brochure in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking; Here speeching American.
A sign on the lion cage at a zoo in the Czech Republic: No smoothen the lion.
A Finnish hotel's instructions in case of fire: If you are unable to leave your room, expose yourself in the window.
A notice in a Japanese hotel: Please not to steal towels. If you are not person to do such, please not to read notice.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
In a Belgrade elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9&11 am daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian orthodox Monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
