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Гаишники — настоящие ценители быстрой езды автовладельцев!
“Пятница! пятницА! пятнИЦА!! пяТНИЦА!! ПЯТНИЗДА!!!” — в ужасе прокричала печень…
Если бы моя мама была вконтакте, она узнала бы обо мне много нового и интересного…
Если зеленый чай просто выведет из Вашего организма вредные шлаки, то уж спирт сожжет их на
корню!
Я сейчас пытаюсь сообразить, как бы сообразить так, чтобы все сообразили, что я сообразил и больше ничего не соображаю?
Детство — это время, когда еще не умеешь думать матом…
Холостяцкая яичница: открыл холодильник, почесал яйца, закрыл холодильник
Вы далеко не дурак. А вблизи — полный идиот.
На дворе дрова, на дровах братва, у братвы трава, вся братва — в дрова.
Ревность - подозрение, что изменяешь не только ты, но и тебе.
Сколько мусорное ведро ни утрамбовывай - выносить все равно придется.
Надпись в туалете: главное не добежать, а донести.
Одиночество - это когда ты всегда знаешь, кто насвинячил на кухне.
Библия учит любить ближнего своего,а камасутра учит, как именно…
Звёзды падают с неба… окурками с верхних этажей
Мне стыдно за вчерашнее, а перед кем — не помню…
Проще сунуть в жопу глобус, чем с утра залезть в автобус.
Человек может всё, пока не начинает что-то делать.
Снес конь яйцо… да не простое — а деду копытом!